Counselling
Counselling is the most traditional type of therapy we offer. As the old adage says: 'a problem shared is a problem halved.' The basic skills used in counselling therapy underpin almost every other type of therapy there is.
What is counselling?
Counselling is a talking therapy where a mental health professional helps support someone explore difficulties which they might be having in life. Traditional counselling is non directive. This means that it is person centred and takes a meandering approach which is lead by the client and not the therapist or counsellor.
This meandering exploration lead by you 'the client' is a hallmark of Rogerian person centred, non directive counselling. Counselling of this nature is about honouring a person's capacity for self healing and growth. It is about empowering the client to find their own solutions. A client is called a client and not a patient because the counsellor and client are speaking on the same level. The onus is on the client to find their own answers not the therapist or counsellor. It is the therapists job to support, nurture and help the client grow, not to do the work for them.
Directive counselling whilst honouring a person centred approach is likely to be more structured and have a specific focus. This still means the client is in control of a session but a therapist might have specific exercises to implement or advice about certain aspects of the difficulty you might be facing. This type of approach is more likely to happen if you are seeing a counsellor for a specific difficulty. for example addiction. Counselling sessions might therefore differ in terms of having a directive or non directive format.
Counselling might be considered as a shorter term therapy than something like psychotherapy and might last a few weeks to several months or longer. You might also go and see a counsellor who specialises in a specific topic. Examples might include bereavement or addiction.
When To See A Counsellor?
It is important to see a counsellor if we are feeling overwhelmed by something and feel unsupported through a difficulty. The rich tapestry of life does not always run smoothly. We all need a little bit of extra support sometimes. Whilst talking to a friend or family member can be helpful it might not give us the right type of support. Sometimes we just need an empathising ear without solutions being offered. We might just need to feel heard. Sometimes we do need more direction and help with something we can't help ourselves with.
We might not have lots of family or close friends to rely on. In addition it might be our close family or friends which are causing the difficulties we need support with. We might be enmeshed in a difficult relationship or family members are intertwined with the difficulty we are having.
When To See A Counsellor?
It is important to see a counsellor if we are feeling overwhelmed by something and feel unsupported through a difficulty. The rich tapestry of life does not always run smoothly. We all need a little bit of extra support sometimes. Whilst talking to a friend or family member can be helpful it might not give us the right type of support. Sometimes we just need an empathising ear without solutions being offered. We might just need to feel heard. Sometimes we do need more direction and help with something we can't help ourselves with.
We might not have lots of family or close friends to rely on. In addition it might be our close family or friends which are causing the difficulties we need support with. We might be enmeshed in a difficult relationship or family members are intertwined with the difficulty we are having.
What Things Can A Counsellor Help With?
You might see a counsellor for general support whereby your sessions have a more general, meandering, exploratory type format. You might see a counsellor for a specific difficulty whereby the sessions are more directive or have specific exercises, homework or things which are specifically worked on.
Examples of things a person might see a counsellor for include: bereavement, relationship difficulties, addiction, bullying, stress, anxiety, depression, work problems, life changes, self identity, sexuality difficulties, abuse, etc
What Things Can A Counsellor Help With?
You might see a counsellor for general support whereby your sessions have a more general, meandering, exploratory type format. You might see a counsellor for a specific difficulty whereby the sessions are more directive or have specific exercises, homework or things which are specifically worked on.
Examples of things a person might see a counsellor for include: bereavement, relationship difficulties, addiction, bullying, stress, anxiety, depression, work problems, life changes, self identity, sexuality difficulties, abuse, etc
How Does Counselling Work?
You would meet with a counsellor on a weekly basis at the same time. The counsellor will provide a safe space for you to explore and speak about your difficulties. Having the opportunity to speak to someone who really listens to you and really understands you is transformative. Having someone else be a witness to your difficulty is, in itself healing. Counselling can help you see yourself more clearly. Getting a problem out into the open is also helpful sometimes so we can explore it with someone else often making it more manageable.
When we speak to someone we do not have a personal or emotional attachment to, it enables us to open up about difficulties we might not, with a family member or friend. A therapist is also able to remain detached, be objective and be non judgemental being there to genuinely help us because they are not personally involved. This can also help you open up about your personal thoughts and feelings.
How Does Counselling Work?
You would meet with a counsellor on a weekly basis at the same time. The counsellor will provide a safe space for you to explore and speak about your difficulties. Having the opportunity to speak to someone who really listens to you and really understands you is transformative. Having someone else be a witness to your difficulty is, in itself healing. Counselling can help you see yourself more clearly. Getting a problem out into the open is also helpful sometimes so we can explore it with someone else often making it more manageable.
When we speak to someone we do not have a personal or emotional attachment to, it enables us to open up about difficulties we might not, with a family member or friend. A therapist is also able to remain detached, be objective and be non judgemental being there to genuinely help us because they are not personally involved. This can also help you open up about your personal thoughts and feelings.
What Are The Limitations Of Counselling?
Whilst counselling is very helpful for lots of difficulties, it also has its limitations. There are mental health difficulties which it is unlikely to be able to help with directly but could be helpful in a more supportive capacity. It is sometimes important to get a diagnosis and take a specific approach to some mental health difficulties.
Examples might include mental health difficulties which are more acute or require psychiatric or medical intervention. e.g. bipolar disorder or schizophrenia. Things like phobias, obsessive compulsive disorder or trauma or ptsd need specialist help which might involve a number of different healthcare practitioners. Of course it might be helpful to see a counsellor just so they can signpost you in the right direction to get the right help.
What Are The Limitations Of Counselling?
Whilst counselling is very helpful for lots of difficulties, it also has its limitations. There are mental health difficulties which it is unlikely to be able to help with directly but could be helpful in a more supportive capacity. It is sometimes important to get a diagnosis and take a specific approach to some mental health difficulties.
Examples might include mental health difficulties which are more acute or require psychiatric or medical intervention. e.g. bipolar disorder or schizophrenia. Things like phobias, obsessive compulsive disorder or trauma or ptsd need specialist help which might involve a number of different healthcare practitioners. Of course it might be helpful to see a counsellor just so they can signpost you in the right direction to get the right help.
Mental Health In The UK (2024) %
Professional counselling
Matthew Alderton - Psychotherapist
MA, BSc, PG Dip, PG Dip Psych
I trained at the Centre for Counselling & Psychotherapy Education to become a counsellor and psychotherapist. I specialise in trauma, ptsd, tinnitus and phobias and associated conditions, e.g. anxiety. I also see clients in a counselling capacity for different difficulties. Examples might include general anxiety disorder, bullying, psycho-sexual difficulties, bereavement, issues around identity and finding meaning in life. Whilst I mainly use counselling skills for these difficulties I also have a wealth of other interventions and therapies I might utilise to help my clients. e.g. emdr, psychotherapy, body psychotherapy or polyvagal theory.
I work in a holistic integrative way, taking into account the ecology of a person's life as well as their mind, body and soul. I am personable, friendly and down to earth. I provide a safe, confidential, collaborative environment for you to work through your difficulty. I look forward to hearing from you.
Difficulties I Use Counselling To Help With
All of the therapies and therapeutic interventions I offer, are underpinned by counselling and a person centred approach. Below are a few of the things I help clients with. If you are not sure if you need help or whether I can help, drop me an email.
Counselling Benefits
Insight
Get a better insight into a specific difficulty. Understand yourself in relation to the difficulty and discover ways that you can move forward or proceed.
Resilience
Begin to appreciate and develop qualities to help with the difficulties of life. Understand and develop your inner strength to be more resilient in the face of adversity.
Support
Feel better because you are being supported with something by another empathetic, compassionate human being.
Support
Feel better because you are being supported with something by another empathetic, compassionate human being.
Counselling Benefits
Contentment
Exploring who you are, and accepting who you are, can help you to feel more secure and content within yourself. You don't need to rely on other peoples acceptance or approval to feel ok.
Resilience
Begin to appreciate and develop qualities to help with the difficulties of life. Understand and develop your inner strength to be more resilient in the face of adversity.
Contentment
Exploring who you are, and accepting who you are, can help you to feel more secure and content within yourself. You don't need to rely on other peoples acceptance or approval to feel ok.
Insight
Get a better insight into a specific difficulty. Understand yourself in relation to the difficulty and discover ways that you can move forward or proceed.
Client's Experience Of Counselling
Counselling London
If you live in London come and see me in picturesque Little Venice Paddington for counselling.
Counselling Hertfordshire
If you live in North London or Herts come and see me in leafy green Cuffley Hertfordshire for counselling.
Therapy Enquiry
If you would like to book therapy with us or have a therapy enquiry please fill in our contact form.